i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Watching her eat just hurts me
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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