idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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