i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
