i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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