Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
This is the high leading the old right now
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
