Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
