I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
