haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
