She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
When are your genitals available?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
