If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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