There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize