I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
