Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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