apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
