And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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