Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize