theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
