so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
