I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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