I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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