HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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