also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize
