This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
