question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
