Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize
