If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
