I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
