i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
It's rum buckets o'clock
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
