My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
