Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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