did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
