i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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