i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
