margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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