don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
