So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
It's official drugs can't kill me
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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