his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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