it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
love makes seman taste better
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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