Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
