So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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