I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
