I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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