Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
