we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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