Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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