Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
