Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
