i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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