No, you can still breathe under the balls.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
