This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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